During the Peseh seder, we have the custom of putting the afikomen in a pillowcase, slinging it over our shoulders, and are asked the following three questions.
Where are you coming from?
Where are you going to?
What do you have with you?
Positive psychology, motivational speakers, and (I am confident to say without knowing specifically where) our sifre kodesh point out that these three questions are fundamental for plotting a successful course of change – like from slavery to freedom.
How do our seder questions apply to self-improvement or teshuvah?
Where are you coming from? Make an objective, unabashed assessment of one’s situation – the more honest the assessment the better.
Where are you going to? Determine and define a clear goal and the steps needed to get there. Some goals are quantifiable like 30 minutes of learning a day and others are unquantifiable like being more supportive and involved at home.
What do you have with you? What are the assets or strengths readily available to help reach the goal. G-d is our biggest asset, however, other tools like timers, apps, or an accountability partner can be helpful on a practical level.
The more time dedicated to answering the questions the more creative and successful the results. Also, writing down goals and detailed plans on how to reach them in a journal changes goals from theoretical to practical and shows a real commitment to change.
Remember, in Makkot 10b it says, ‘Hashem leads the person down the path of his choice.’
Yitzhak Sasson 